In the past 18 months I’ve encountered four perfect women, such as I’d never encountered before. Strange because perfection is not possible with respect to humanity. Yet perfection can exist within the context of imperfection. Surrounded by their human imperfections, these four women possessed perfection to an extreme degree. May I tell you about them?

Girl 1
She was perfect to an extreme degree- in her own way. Before her, I’d never met a woman whom I truly wanted to be with. I honestly wanted to be her husband, share my life with her. I had never met a woman that caused me to forget everyone else and only see her- until she came along. I even wrote this blog about her. The way I felt about her is exactly the way I want to feel about the woman I spend my life with. With respect to the intensity of my feelings toward her, she was perfect. Even so, she had a child and I couldn’t seem to get around that.

Girl 2
She was perfect to an extreme degree- in her own way. She was exactly the type of person I want to marry. There was seemingly no flaw in her personhood. Her integrity, character and consistency were never in question. She was dependable and I knew she’d be there for me no matter what. She would drive any distance if I needed her to. She would inconvenience herself at any moment for me. She treated me as if I were royalty. Her treatment of me was far beyond anything I’d ever experienced. But it wasn’t fake or an elaborate front- that was just her. There was no chink in her armor. With respect to her personhood, how she treated me and her consistency, she was perfect. I loved her to pieces- but I wasn’t in love her.

Girl 3
She was perfect to an extreme degree- in her own way. She had this amazing ability: she just knew how to talk to me. She knew exactly what to say to motivate me, to get the best out of me. While Girl 2 inspired me to want to do better for myself and be better, she (and Girl 1) didn’t necessarily know how to point me in that direction. Girl 3 on the other hand even knew what advice to give me with respect to career moves. She knew how, even in my most humiliating moment, to talk to me so as to remove the shame I might feel and instead make me feel like everything was okay and that I was such a special, powerful man. With respect to how she could talk to me and help me realize my fullest potential, she was perfect. She made it known that she wanted kids, however and I don’t.

Girl 4
She was perfect to an extreme degree- in her own way. As it regards physical beauty, Girl 1 was far beyond normative. Girl 3 was very beautiful, sexy even. Girl 4 was extreme, however. She lived every day of her life in a dress and high heels. I’m not sure whether or not she even owns a pair of jeans. Girl 4 routinely attracts the attention of professional athletes, millionaires. Girl 4 has been pulled over by cops- simply to ask for her phone number. She is aesthetically the prototype. Not only is she beautiful and meticulous about her appearance but I also carried a sexual attraction to her that, at times, frightened me. Beauty was her and she knew it. With respect to her beauty, sex appeal and how she maintained it, she was perfect. However, like Girl 3, she wanted a kid too.

All four were extreme in their respective special way (more than any other in my lifetime) but there was so much more to each of them. They were not one trick ponies by any stretch. There was something about each of them that I was amazed by, complimented by other little surprises that made them interesting enough to consider long-term possibilities. The ironic thing is that all four came back, to back, to back to back. Quite strange.


Duane Terrell

You better go run and find Girl #2 cause she seems to have all the important stuff plus the no children thing you want.

Good Luck:

Tiffany-Nicole Haynes

Don't you hate that? You find 4 people that you wish you could purée into one to create the absolutely perfect person. While each of the women possess qualities that I think are essential in the woman that you ultimately choose to marry, it is obvious that neither of these women are the one for you, period! When you find the right one, you will make whatever life alternations are necessary to have her in yours. If you aren't willing to do that, then she just isn't that one!

Allow me to submit something else into your psyche. Perhaps it isn't the woman that you've encountered but you who is perfectly imperfect!

Eric Williams

On a personal note, is there a specific reason you don't want to have kids? Do you just not like kids at all (which is not a bad thing)?

D.M Hopewell

Duane oh how I wish. I honestly prayed at nights that I would wake up and feel for her what she felt for me…still kinda wish that. Anything less would be unfair to her. She definitely had it all…

D.M Hopewell

smh…it's the worst. but i guess almost doesn't count :(

D.M Hopewell

eric i think we should have that convo offline lol

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